Tamil Features

77 Thoughts I Had While Watching Anegan

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Anegan TeaserSo this begins in Burma? Hmmm.

It’s the 1950s? Double hmmm.

I’ve heard this song before

Amyra Dastur with bangs. Uh-oh.

Dhanush doesn’t have a shirt in this part of the movie.

The pretty girl and the shirtless guy are now in love.

I’ve heard this song before.

This Aishwarya Devan is certainly something.

..and she gets married to Nandu Jegan. Smh.

Friend doesn’t like Ash at all. No popcorn for you, you meanie.

Iron box on Amyra’s tummy. Man.

The dad’s the villain, peoples.

Everybody’s hating the Tamil people. *sniffs*

Big ship like Titanic. Amyra wears a saree. Lovers re-united. Everything’s looking great, but you know this is not going to end well.

Brilliant underwater scene.

Ok so that was all some dream?

No, this Amyra says it’s some previous birth knowledge thing.

Present day Amyra is annoying me. Friend likes her, though. Weirdo.

Nice clothes. Plus, she lives in that glass house from Raja Rani. Must be lovely.

Uggh. Amyra almost kissed her maid. But, it’s all a misunderstanding. Cue eyeroll.

Loosu ponnu, says the guy next to me. Then, cuddles up to his girlfriend.

Friend and I move away from each other. This is awkward.

Popcorn rain is happening. Dhanush’s opening scene it seems.

Boss zooms into the shot in a fancy car. It opens on top and all. His name is Ashwin. Remember Ko? Anegan is a spoof movie?

Ok, forget that. Ashwin just damaged Madhu’s car. Someone’s gonna get hurt real bad.

NANDU JEGAN IN DA HOUSE

Bah. Lame jokes.

Ashwin and Madhu in the lift together. Madhu recognises Ashwin as the man from all her previous janmam dreams.

Ashwin though, is acting as if he hates the fact that a beautiful woman is all over him. Dude.

Lift accident happens. Ashwin saves Madhu and then runs away from her ’cause the woman is still all over him.

KARTHIK MUTHURAMAN IN DA HOUSE.

Friend sniffs quietly into her dupatta because she loves him.

The mom crowd in the audience are now paying attention to Anegan. Well played, KV Anand. Well played.

Some new project and stuff. The team has to party and all before they begin.

Onto the third song of the film. In a beach house filled with booze of every kind. Because that’s how techies party, apparently.

So this is YOLO? *listens intently*

I’ve heard this song before.

Man, they almost kissed.

Ok, so Madhumita is this rich girl who keeps giving Ashwin stuff.

Ashwin is playing hard to get man. She’s your one true love, dude. Just grab onto her.

But, no. He’s getting distracted. Who wouldn’t? Aishwarya Devan is frickin’ hot.

Goddamn it. They just killed her off.

KV Anand just made my new most favourite person die. Or was it SuBha? Either way, not cool brothers.

Madhu is acting all looney near the dead body. Take her to the shrink, people.

Ok, Karthik is the only voice of reason in this film. Thank goodness.

Ashwin takes Madhu to the shrink, she reminds me of Lakshmi Manchu, but it is not her.

I’ve heard this song before. Also, red hair wig. Fire that stylist, Dhanush.

Ashwin is crossing the road and someone tried to kill him. It’s not a surprise anymore, KV Anand. We know these two have some enemies.

Gods. This Madhu is a Genelia clone. She just drove off a bridge. Take her to the loony bin please.

Government Hospital for the rich, Madhu. Nobody is outraged at this, except her Uncle.

Bah. Melodrama. Amyra just can’t do melodrama.

Good news is, Dhanush can.

Ashish Vidyarthi is here and he’s got an ugly scar. He might be the villain.

Kaali Time. Dangamaari Oodhaari. Only song I like in this.

Popcorn Rain once again. Everybody’s dancing.

My friend is busy telling people to sit down, because this is Sathyam Cinemas and people just can’t behave like that here.

Nobody cares.

More dancing. Free popcorn for me. Win.

This Kalyani is so meh. Why do you like her so much Kaali?

Kaali is going to the jail for his love. *sniffs*

Oh, Karthik looks so handsome in his eighties avatar.

Mom crowd is sighing.

Friend forgets to close her mouth.

Oh, it’s been Karthik all along

Always. Always, they kill Dhanush first and Amyra sacrifices herself for the loves.

I don’t understand now. Is this a story of love transcending time or what?

Drug abuse. Hmmm.

Another song I’ve heard before.

Epic acting by Karthik. Welcome back, sir

…should’ve waited a little before I wrote that down.

Dhanush steals the show, now.

Who’s going to die? Madhu or Ashwin?

Bye Bye Karthik.

Still confused. What is it they’re trying to tell us. Drugs are bad?

So they went to Burma after all? Silly girl Madhu.

KV Anand is not even pretending to be subtle now. There’s an obvious shot of the tree trunk with Moonar Oona + Samudra written on it.

That’s enough for today then.

Going home to immediately watch VIP.

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